We can't circle like this forever, Captain Russel; we'll run out of fuel!

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

As they say in the comic books “Aarrrggghhh!” No, she’s not getting worse, and, to quote Python, “She’s not dead yet.” But she can’t stay in her current holding pattern forever, no matter that she’s a tough old bird, 83 years old. My Mom, aka Rae Russel, is still in and out of her semi-consciousness, still struggling with a fever and congestion in her lungs. All this directs energy and healing away from her brain and this has to occur if she’s going to fully wake up and get herself headed toward home.

The longer she’s inert in bed, the greater the toll on her body and the longer her eventual physical rehab will be. So, here’s your mission gang, should you decide to accept it because it isn’t impossible: please keep sending her your psychic support.

I’ll keep posting photos of how she looked before surgery to remind and inspire you. All of us here agree, two warm-hearted doctors included, my Mom/Rae is fully capable of restoring herself if she gets out of the damned hospital that is taking its toll on her. (The same hospital helping keep her alive.)

Rae’s struggle in Kaiser Hospital Terra Linda (a small community in San Rafael, Marin county, 20 miles from my house) is both small and epic. While our massive financial institutions loudly fight to continue their high flying existence as we’ve know them, one old woman is quietly fighting for some extra time in her hometown on the ground in Petaluma with her friends and family.

I keep saying, including to my Mom in her bed: I’m ready to let her go ahead and die if that’s what’s she wants to do. Problem is (for me), the last I heard from her own mouth just two weeks ago, this wasn’t what she wanted. Before going in to have her brain tumor removed on Monday September 15 she said she wanted some more time.

So c’mon Rae, if this decision still stands, now’s the time to open your eyes, start talking more regularly above a mumble, and can get your ass outta there. Then you’ll have earned more interaction and endless yakking with your fans while rehabilitating your tired old body.

I could report more about medical details—meds, antibiotics, blood oxygen saturation levels and endlessly on—but frankly I don’t care (much) about them. The doctors reign here, the nurses dispense these goodies, and I focus on her will to live, her psychic survival and from this her physical strength to carry on. What’s hardest is the not-knowing. I can only tell myself this is one more (last?) lesson Rae is delivering, me doing all the talking at her bedside, she mostly just listening, a role reversal if ever there was one.

Please join me in pulling on her chain linking her to our realm of consciousness here on Earth, this crazy and fun existence. I know it’s ultimately her call, but if she’s going to make a grab for it, we’re here to help and cheer her on. Thanks for rooting for her, directly if you believe in such techniques as I do, or in whatever way works for you.

With love,
Jack